Day One

Well here we are day one of something so foreign to me. Yes, I was nervous and yes, I still am, but God has other plans for me today and I'm truly blessed.

I woke up feeling terrible, mostly upset and depressed, but still not feeling that great. I wasn't able to go into my internship and had to call off helping with practice unfortunately. However, one of my best friends convinced me to come grab dinner, we had these plans for weeks. I decided to give it a go. I didn't shower, didn't do anything. Four hours prior I took my first prednisone. I took it with a granola bar. I was told my appetite would insanely increase, however I was not feeling any sort of food.

At dinner I sat and played with my food, rather than indulge in it. The mango sherbet dessert did make me want to eat, so I'm thankful for that!

After dinner my lovely former teammate and a Sister in Christ texted me asking me to come to FCA (Fellowship for Christian Athletes). First, it feels weird as I am a fifth-year and not competing anymore; I didn't want to be out of place. Second, I honestly was not up to shower and leave the house. Kylie and God had other plans. Kylie convinced me to come and so I went.

It was the best blessing I had in quite some time. To be around my friends, lots of my friends I haven't seen in awhile. To worship and to play games with the people who care for me, it was just everything I didn't want, but turned out to be everything I ever needed.

After we went out for dinner, I still did not have an appetite, but I wanted to join, I wanted to feel apart of something again and to not feel alone. So I went and had a wonderful time. I picked up my close guy friend Andrew on the way. It was so wonderful to just be loved for a night and have everyone I love in one place. God is good.

The first day wasn't so bad. My symptoms weren't terrible. I had a rash on my stomach for a little, but it went away. I did feel really thirsty, so I was able to drink a lot of water today, never a bad thing. And I felt the lack of appetite.

Until tomorrow.

Philippians 4:13

-Kersten

Beginning of it all, AGAIN

I was diagnosed with lupus eight years ago. Through a series of tests and years of feeling ill they found out what was causing all the pain in my life. It was nice finally having an answer, but it has not been an easy road these past eight years.

I have lived such a blessed life! I have such a wonderful, loving and supportive family. I have amazing friends and I have been lucky enough to find my light in God.

Lupus has brought me a lot of downs, but those downs make the ups just so much better! I was lucky enough to avoid having to take any steroid medication, only anti inflammatories here and there. I did that so I could pursue my passion in the sport of diving at the collegiate level.

For the past three years I was a diver for the University of Utah. I finished my senior year as a captain of my amazing team, All-American on platform, 3rd at Pac-12 Championships on platform, Two time Pac-12 All-Academic First Team, 10-meter record holder, National Honor Society of Leadership and Success Member and many more. I could not have done it without my amazing coaches, support staff, doctors, family, teammates but most importantly the grace of God.

Everything fell into place by living His plan, not mine. But now I am at a dead end of a long successful tunnel and I'm praying for light.

I have been clear of my lupus symptoms for quite a bit. Here and there I would have fatigue and the butterfly rash, especially after sun exposure, however I was feeling quite wonderfully.

Yesterday I went into the doctors for flu-like symptoms. I was put on my first steroid with having lupus, prednisone. I have heard so many things about this drug and my heart hurts knowing what is to come in the next little while. I just pray for the strength to get through it.

Tomorrow is a new day, a start of a new me.

-Kersten